I am having a full on COVID-19 hair crisis


I have seen you at the grocery store. I saw you in the local drug store. And there you were, driving around in your car trying to avoid detection.

But I saw you, sporting that COVID-19 hair.

Look, I get it. We are all suffering in many ways right now. And that includes in the hair department. A lot of people look like they just got out of bed. Now, while that may be true of some, I refuse to believe this many people simply don’t care about how they look during the pandemic.

Like everyone else, I have not been able to get a haircut. Unlike many men, I am fairly hair obsessed. For those of you who have met me, this probably comes as a shock. But let me tell you, if I didn’t care as much as I do it wouldn’t even look this good.

For years, I have had my hair cut every three weeks like clockwork. I always like to be well groomed. In fact, it has bordered on being a little embarrassing. Of course, I grew up in an era where longer hair was common for guys, and I certainly had longer hair. I was that kid with the rat-tail comb sticking out of his back pocket who was ready to whip it out and keep his hair neat at a moment’s notice.

I was so into my hair, actually, that when I told people I had joined the military late in my senior year of high school, some didn’t believe me simply because they didn’t think I would get a haircut. Well, I did. It was very painful emotionally, but I did it.

I have kept my hair generally short since then, except for a period of longer hair just after I was discharged. I had some ugly 80s hair and some bad 90s cuts to be sure.

By the late 1990s, I just decided to shave my head down to stubble. No fuss, no muss. It was already going white anyway, so why not just cut it?

Well, that didn’t last too long and I decided to go the other way. I got it spiked up and started bleaching it.

Yes, I bleached my hair. And I bleached it for 17 years or so. In fact, when I started this job I was still bleaching my hair.

I eventually let it grow out because by that time, it was pretty much white anyway. But I kept up with my haircuts. I had my last one about two weeks before the shelter at home order was put in place.

My hair has now reached a point where I am just going to let it grow. Why not? I still have some to grow so I might just ride this tiger and see how it goes. It is already growing over my ears and filling out in a very unflattering way, but what better time to get past this awkward stage than during a pandemic?

But I still get up and shower every morning, work from home or not. And I “do” my hair every day. I don’t sit around looking like a bum. My wife is also working from home, and if there is one person on the Earth that I don’t want to look bad around it is my wife.

I think getting ready for work even when you are working from home is important. It helps me stay engaged and do my best job. Also, I can head out if needed at a moment’s notice.

And I care what I look like. Vain? Maybe, but I don’t want to look like a slob.

I wish I could say the same for everyone.

So, the next time you see me after this is all over, my hair might look a little on the wild side. That is just me trying to get my hair to the next stage. Just please don’t stare too long – I am a little hair sensitive.

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