They want to add what to the Olympics?


Ah, the good old days.

The days when the Olympics meant real sports. Sports that go all the way back to the first Olympic games. Sports like running, the long jump, shot put, javelin and good old pankration. Never heard of that one? Think MMA fighting but for dudes who worshipped a ton of gods and were pretty much old men at 40.

But besides pankration, we all understand the classic Olympic sports. Running and jumping and swimming and throwing stuff – we get it. And it makes perfect sense.

Things have of course changed over the years and sports have been added and or dropped. For instance, not many people remember that tug of war was once an Olympic event. I wonder how hard you bragged about that bronze medal you got in tug of war to the guys at the corner bar?

I understand that the Olympics have to change with the times in order to stay relevant. It’s bad enough that they are a horrible investment for the host countries, at least they can stay current.

To that end, there are some new sports under consideration for the Olympics. These new sports include karate, sport climbing, surfing and skateboarding.

Yes, skateboarding could be an Olympic sport. Dude, that would be, like, totally tubular and stuff. And surfing? Gnarly.

But there is one proposed “sport” that admittedly made me shake my head. I am all for change when it is necessary. I support keeping up with the times. I am a big fan of progress.

For the life of me, however, I can’t see how break dancing could be an Olympic sport. You read that right – break dancing. If you are like me, you didn’t even realize break dancing was still a thing.

Apparently, it is still a thing. Spinning and twirling on the ground could be an Olympic sport. Look, I appreciate the physicality of it. I couldn’t do it. Spin on my head? No thanks.

But an Olympic sport? I don’t get it.

If I fell down the stairs I would spin and tumble and flip and fly around in a very similar fashion to a break dancer. The difference – besides me breaking bones – is that I wouldn’t expect judges to give me a score at the end of it.

“Nice form, Jennings, but we need to see more of the bone from your compound fracture and we just weren’t buying it when your head slammed into the wall giving you a concussion. You get a 6.”

I will say that I am not a big Olympics watcher these days. I do enjoy some winter events and a few summer events, but it is pretty much a commercial event and not one pitting the best amateurs from around the world in a variety of events. Thanks for that, Russia.

But I think I would rather watch curling that break dancing. And, let’s be honest, watching curling is not exciting or fast-paced in any way.

Will break dancing actually become an Olympic event? That is far from certain. But once these things start being talked about, you never know what might happen.

The one good thing is that I am sure America would have a great break dancing “team.” We invented it, didn’t we? And I am seriously asking, because I have no idea.