New conspiracy theories take the crazy cake


Let’s just go ahead and admit that we live in a crazy, crazy world. Things have never been more insane and downright dumb than they are right now.

OK, maybe the Salem Witch trials were worse, but it is pretty bad now.

And with people screaming about election fraud and fighting in the streets and government monitoring devices being put in vaccines and the way the Bears have been playing, I am about ready to give up.

I have said before that I am no fan of conspiracy theories and think that those who spread them do a severe disservice to the country and the world. No, 9/11 wasn’t and inside job and yes, the horrific school shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary School did happen. We also landed on the moon, for the people out there who don’t believe that. And sorry, but there is no evidence of election fraud. The reality might be tough for some to swallow, but it is true. Joe Biden will be president in a matter of weeks.

We are starting to outdo ourselves when it comes to conspiracies. That guy who blew up himself in an RV in Nashville? He believed in the Lizard People. It is a real thing, trust me. Don’t google it – it will take you down a rabbit hole you don’t want to go down.

Conspiracy theories have been around forever, as we know. Who really shot JFK? Did John Wilkes Booth/Hitler/Elvis really survive? I mean, you name the crazy and there are people who believe it. Look at the discredited and highly ridiculous QAnon conspiracy theory. Actually, don’t – it will just make your head hurt.

But there have been a couple of recent conspiracies that I had never heard before and thought I would share. Yes, I saw both of these on social media, so you know they have to be true. I say that with tongue firmly planted in cheek, of course.

The first is a conspiracy involving Joe Biden (a recent favorite target, not surprisingly) and good old Bill Gates. Seriously, if Bill Gates did half of the stuff people accused him of, he would be a world ruling criminal mastermind for the ages.

Anyway, according to this theory, Biden and Gates are working together to weaken people by spraying fine particles into the upper atmosphere to block out sun rays. I know this sounds made up, and it is important to remember that it is made up, but some people actually believe it to be true.

I don’t know how immune to reality you have to be to believe this, but I would guess very immune.

The second one made the rounds on some of the guitar player sites I follow. This one even came with a graphic. Actually, it is a schematic.

According to believers of this one, the schematic they posted shows a 5G chip that is implanted in you when you get the COVID-19 vaccine so the government can track you. Sounds scary, right? They even posted picture after picture of the schematic.

Turns out – this is where the guitar thing comes into play – it is the schematic for an old guitar distortion pedal. The pedal, the Boss Metal Zone, was initially introduced in 1983.

Seriously, this one made me laugh out loud. But there are people walking around the Earth who believe it to be true.

I understand as long as there are people, conspiracy theories will survive. And as long as there is the Internet they will continue to thrive. But please, don’t be easily fooled. The world is already flooded with fools.